“Been At My Lowest But I Still Show Up”

Have you ever reached a point in your life where everything was happening at the same time, both the good and the bad but mostly the bad but you can’t afford to break down because you still have to show up for work, school or to your business? Well, at this very moment I am in that state.

A few days ago, I was telling one of my friends that I can’t believe that we’ve reached a stage in our lives where no matter what we are going through we have to ‘show up’. A lot of things happened in the past couple of months that have deeply hurt me and also changed the way I look at life. My brother’s sudden death being the worst of it all.

I always talk about the importance of taking care of ones mental health. It helps you deal with challenges that you face in life a bit better.

I took part in The Shield Roundtable event a few days after my brother’s passing, a lot of people wondered why I went because even the team at Shield would have understood if I didn’t show up. The one thing I learnt from being depressed as a teenager is that you have to be mentally strong as a person and not let grief consume or discourage you from the things you have to do.

You have to train your mind to focus. Grieving is hard because you have to deal with denial, anger, confusion and loss. I felt all these things at once but I knew Sanele would have wanted me to go there and represent a brand that does something that I have always done which is giving back to the community through Sports.

I have also learnt how to control my emotions. I breakdown if I have to but still get back up and finish whatever task I’m busy with. I have days where I don’t even leave the house let alone do anything for the whole day. There are also days where I feel like there’s a sharp pain in my heart but guess what? I still show up as the best version of myself and that on its own has kept me going.

If there is one thing that I can advice people to always do, is to ‘Get up, dress up and show up’ everything else will fall into place.

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  1. I always find it kind of ironic that the more we grow up, the more the phrase – the show must go on – reflects our mental state when we are going through tough times. I agree with you that we continually need to show up for whatever we do no matter what we are going through because wallowing in sorrow is not an option. Also learning to show up no matter the challenges is the best teacher because it develops resilience. This was a wonderful piece. I’m so sorry about the loss of your brother but I’m sure he is looking down from heaven and proud of the woman you are becoming.

  2. Hope and a prayer is the best remedy for me in times like that, I’m sure your brother is proud of the courage you showed by showing up, regardless of what you’re going through

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